Signs of the Times

I was driving down the road yesterday when I saw a truck passing me that said "Kingdom Alarm Systems". I kind of chuckled to myself thinking about how "out of business" they will be when we are in the real Kingdom.

Traveling along I began to recall some of the names that well-meaning Christians have labeled their businesses without really thinking through the implications.

Agape Wrecking Service. Does this mean they unconditionally love all wrecks? Or that they have a Godly love for wrecking things?

Believers Polygraph Systems. Is this a service that can only tell if Christians are lying? Or perhaps it's a machine that can tell by your answers whether you really are a believer or not. Maybe it means that believers will pass the test even if they are lying.

Heavenly World Travel Agency. Could this be where angels can book a cruise to the Bahamas? Or where people who are experiencing "hell on earth" can plan a change of scenery?

Covenant Arbitration Group. I wonder if they list Moses as one of their clients? It would be a little scary to have to subpoena the Creator of the Universe as a defendant. "Mr. Creator Sir, did you understand the terms of the contract? Did you read the fine print?" Exactly who would you turn to to enforce a monetary judgment against the Almighty?

Exodus Home Builders. It would kind of stink to spend six months building your dream home and then immediately have to pack up and walk away from it. At least you might get some cool gifts from your neighbors on your march out of the neighborhood.

Narrow Way Road Construction. I just hope you're not in a hurry.

Abundant Life Weight-Loss. Maybe the abundant life is the problem in the first place. A better name might be the Living Sacrifice Weight Loss... on second thought people might just take that to mean grilling more hamburgers... poor cows. (not the people trying to lose weight, the actual cows that the hamburgers came from!)

And finally the one that puzzles me the most but I see it everywhere I go: "Wine and Spirit".

At first I used to think this was a store where you picked up Communion supplies but I'm beginning to wonder if those really are Bibles they are hiding in them there brown paper sacks.

Soap & Tattoos

I've seen a lot of silliness and foolish things in churches and from Christians in my time. A couple of years ago I wrote about a church that was offering communion for pets. (http://www.seriousfaith.com/daily-devotionals-bible-teaching-detail.asp?teachingnumber=413)

I thought that was about the craziest I'd ever hear about until I heard of churches up in Canada and down in Florida where the people themselves were howling, barking, roaring and clucking like pets, complete with fleas and the ability to sense a coming earthquake.

Recently I flipped on one the "Christian" channelS, and saw yet another preacher promising instant miracles if only you would call him and ask (they don't even have to solicit a donation, that's a given). The instant miracles really didn't catch my attention (already been done a thousand times) but the strange yellow square object in his hand did.

I listened for a few more minutes to find out that this was a "miracle producing olive oil bar of soap" (yep, you read that right) and if only you would let him send you your very own bar to wash with, you would be covered in miracle producing power.

That was followed by the usual preaching crusade with a never ending line of people who wanted to come up on stage and testify about how the miracle working olive oil bar had healed them of breast cancer, removed their back pain, brought them financial blessing and turned the Detroit Lions into a real live professional football team. (the last one really didn't happen!)

Of course the most talked about and obvious benefit was its miraculous ability to bring prosperity and abundance to the user. If the ridiculous and dangerous aspects of this kind of chicanery needs to be explained (and evidently it does to all the miracle-bar-of-soap-power-handkerchief-bottle-of-healing-oil-prayer-cloth-touch-your-hand-to-my-hand-on-the-TV-screen Christians out there), then we are truly in a sad state of affairs in today's church.

I'd love to say that that's the wackiest thing I've seen recently, but alas, it's not. Our local news station ran a story about a church in our area whose pastor runs a tattoo shop out of the church. This pastor went on to explain that getting a tattoo was a spiritual experience and brought you closer to God (I'm assuming he wasn't talking about getting an infection and dying). Never mind that this "Pastor" (aka, the spiritually mature shepherd leaders of God's assembly of Believers) looked about 20 something years old and was adorned in such a manner as to proudly display that his extreme worldliness had no affect on his Christian testimony.

This was reported with a straight face as if ALL CLAIMS to be a church or a pastor or a religion or a Christian must be treated with equal seriousness.

I'm not sure if God laughs, cries or rolls his eyes at this kind of nonsense. Lord help us!

New Editorial Blog!

I've started this blog separate from the SeriousFaith.com website because I wanted to have a more informal place to talk about topics and issues that don't fit on a more structured Christian teaching website.

This blog will be more like my own Editorial Column where it's all opinion and comment, not teaching.

So feel free to read, comment, hammer me, laugh with me and have fun.

Blessings, Brent